A soulmate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for who we’re pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other. No matter what else goes wrong around us, with that one person we’re safe in our own paradise. Our soulmate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction. When we’re two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we’ve found the right person. Our soulmate is the one who makes life come to life.”

"Finding solutions is essential if we want to make the most of our caring," Gates said. "If we have clear and proven answers anytime an organization or individual asks, 'How can I help?,' then we can get action and we can make sure that none of the caring in the world is wasted. But complexity makes it hard to mark a path of action for everyone who cares, and that makes it hard for their caring to matter."


4) Hmm... weird again. Dunno what books you've read, but that is totally false. Nothing is perfect and the "LoA" I subscribe to doesn't say what you've described. Visualizing is only one tool of LoA... one which I don't really use. The perfect relationship and perfect diet are total BS. you don't visualize those things, you either build them (a good healthy relationship, not a perfect one) or follow them (a good diet).
I’m glad you’re enjoying my book on using the law of attraction for a specific person, G! There are a couple of possibilities for why he didn’t come. 1) You had resistance. For example, you may have had some fears or doubts about what would happen once he got there. 2) You tried to control the outcome. When you bought the ticket, you decided how things were going to happen. Rather than letting the Universe determine how he would come to you, you decided how he would come.
In the New Thought philosophy, the Law of Attraction is the belief that by focusing on positive or negative thoughts, people can bring positive or negative experiences into their life.[1][2] The belief is based on the idea that people and their thoughts are both made from "pure energy", and that through the process of "like energy attracting like energy" a person can improve their own health, wealth, and personal relationships.
The first article about this was in Psychology Today - “Throw Away Your Vision Board.” After a quarter million hits and much hate mail, I wanted to make sure that I had a thorough LOA understanding so I read every book from the originators of the law in the late 1800s and became a certified “Advanced Practitioner of the Law of Attraction” by one of the authors of "The Secret." I then wrote “Throw Away Your Vision Board 2.” This time the feedback was a little more positive. I recently published the book, Throw Away Your Vision Board: The Truth About the Law of Attraction. This article will summarize 14 reasons why there is no LOA.  
Thanks so much..so glad you liked it. Relationships can be tricky because there is so much emotional charge around them. It is easy to get off track, and you are right, going back to information that reminds us of these truths and helps us refocus is one of the best things we can do. The reinforcement is necessary to help us reprogram because essentially that is what we need to do. For me, there are two things. First, is getting into that space of trust and knowing by looking back on past manifestations. We have a tendency to put more trust in the negative ones and then dismiss the positive ones…which is one of our weird quirks. And I do my best to step back from anything that isn’t making me feel good and just go do something else, like read a book or take a walk.
In many cases, the underlying issue, when it is broken down to its absolute core, is fear of some kind. Fear that people won’t think we are good enough. Fear of being vulnerable to someone. Fear of actually being happy—yeah, lots of people are actually afraid of that. We get so wrapped up in our crap and it becomes such a strong part of our identity, we may not actually know who we are without all the stories we tell ourselves. If you identify yourself as the perpetually single person, an asshole magnet or simply ‘unlucky’ in love, who are you without those labels?
1) The Soulmate List. The first list is a list of ‘Green Light’ qualities and attributes that you’d like your soulmate to have.  In other words, this is what you want to “get” in a Soulmate.   In this list, you’ll describe all of the physical and non-physical characteristics you envision your soulmate to have. Here you want to include things that will begin to describe the kind of man or woman who would really make your heart sing.
When I tell people that this is what it really means to believe in a law of attraction, they don't believe me. They say, that's ridiculous. We don't control everything in the universe. But you are a perfect example of the negative, blame the victim side of the LOA. I understand, appreciate, and respect that maintaining this perspective is consistent with your beliefs in the LOA. My personal belief is that this is not healthy for you, others with whom you connect, or for society in general.
I was thinking the same. I've never heard a "professional" man of his age, speaking like such a catty little 15 year old girl. If you read all the comments you can see how he speaks down to/mocks every person who disagrees with him, while sarcastically throwing little digs in wherever he can. I came to this article looking for evidence to discredit the LOA. I just can't seem to take anything he wrote seriously because of his unprofessionalism. Very narrsassitic.
Living “as if” can be a powerful way to help yourself to manifest love. What this means is that you should try to live every day not as though you’re looking for love but as though you’ve already found it! Embrace self-love and dress as you would if you were spending time with your partner. Try to make space for them in your home. See yourself as a person with a loving soulmate and a bright future, and make plans accordingly.

I am so glad you found the post helpful. That is great that your faith in the ability to consciously create our reality is growing. As it does, you will see more and more ‘proof’, which will just reinforce that, setting of a wonderful cycle. Just always remember to be patient, and make your core focus feeling good about the work you are doing. Find content that resonates with you, and really focus on learning from those sources. That encounter with that person definitely shows you are moving towards what you want. Being able to truly be ourselves will make the process of attracting a relationship so much easier, you have no idea.
Your thoughts have the power to create, so it is possible that you created this situation, but you can also turn it around. Let go of any worries or fears you have in regards to his ex. Be open to being in a relationship with him again and having him there 100%. Focus on being at one with being the relationship. Keep your vibration high by doing things you enjoy. The higher you can keep your vibration, the faster you should see results using the Law of Attraction for love to attract your specific person.
The first thing to do when you feel that there is room for more love in your life is to fill your thoughts and actions with nothing but absolute love. By flooding your mind with feelings of positivity and love for yourself and those around you, your ability to love and be loved back can shine through to others. Here are some visualization exercises for love that you can consider too.
I am in a situation where the man I just got back into my life (applying the LOA) is saying he just wants to be friends. I don’t understand why because when we are together things are great. When we first got back cool after a nasty seperation, he was reaching out to me constantly. Then I told him I wanted to spend more time with him and it seems after I said that, things went sour and he jumped from wanting to be around me to saying nothing is there anymore and he just wants to be friends. No warning or anything. This is the man I want to be around. I am very happy with him and cannot be in the same place I was with him when we were on bad terms, I refuse to go back to that space! I have been saying affirmations like “I am fun to be around;I Am someone that comes naturally to ____; I attract ____ naturally. etc” I guess i’m in a rush to spend time with him due to lost time when we weren’t talking. PLease help me! I have a strong desire to be with and around this man.
Thank you for your comments. Hard to be positive when talking about the LOA. It's focus on blaming is pervasive. I am a positive psychologist and have proposed a new way of looking at attraction called the Principle of Attraction. As a Principle, like tends to attract like. Positive thoughts, feelings, actions, and words often attracts positivity...but not always. It's not a law, it's a principle, based on positive and social psychology.
I stumbled on your page a couple weeks ago. I’ve been coping with post partum depression for the past few months. Although medication has absolutely helped take the edge off, ever since reading your words I’ve felt a consistent and steady rise in my feelings of happiness. The medication helped stabilize my depression, that’s true, but your words helped me tap into my joy. Joy I haven’t felt in years, possibly since I was a child myself.

When I tell people that this is what it really means to believe in a law of attraction, they don't believe me. They say, that's ridiculous. We don't control everything in the universe. But you are a perfect example of the negative, blame the victim side of the LOA. I understand, appreciate, and respect that maintaining this perspective is consistent with your beliefs in the LOA. My personal belief is that this is not healthy for you, others with whom you connect, or for society in general.


There is no real risk to chasing your dreams. As far as I can tell, it’s a lot of fun and a thrilling journey. My experience with countless clients over many, many years, is that all the risk…all the frustration…and all the disappointment, is born from not chasing dreams. (But please remember, there is a way to chase dreams successfully which is like chasing butterflies. Put yourself in the right energy field, and become a magnet for those butterflies. The more direct method of butterfly catching is so much harder).
So that’s where we need to start. The definition of whatever success means to you must created and written out in a detailed plan. You don’t need to know every step to take in order to get you there; but you need to have a general sense of direction and an overall plan for its attainment. When you fail to do this, you can’t really categorize these as goals, but more so as hopes and wishes.
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