Manifesting destiny and attracting the appropriate energies is, of course, a very fickle, tricky concept. To learn more about how to play it right and build the life you've always dreamed of, I consulted with experts Cali Estes, PhD, Life Coach, Recovery Coach and Founder of The Addictions Coach; April Masini, relationship and etiquette expert and popular media resource; and Davida Rappaport, intuitive psychic with over 35 years of experience. Here are 11 ways to understand the Law of Attraction and how it applies to manifesting the destiny you desire.


Hi Shona, If you want to successfully use the Law of Attraction for love for a specific person, you need to overcome your fear. Your thoughts and emotions create, so if you continue to be afraid, you will create the things that you fear – his cheating, his not wanting to commit, etc. Sometimes the easiest way to overcome fear is to think about the worst thing that would happen if things didn’t go the way you want them. Often, that worst fear isn’t all that bad, and it’s easy to then let the fear go. Other times, it might be necessary to use tapping or EFT to get rid of the fear.
This works wonders to help make space in your heart for someone new… Or simply to become more “in tune” with the opposite sex. Check out this free video presentation about the breakthrough book Law of Attraction ‘Origins’ that teaches powerful techniques that can help with this. Plus there is also another popular program called ‘Magnetic Love Mysteries Revealed’ with tips on how to attract your soulmate or perfect romantic partner.
Why does a person keep smoking cigarettes when they know smoking might give them cancer? Why does an overweight person keep eating when they know they should be dieting? Once again: they’re doing more to avoid pain than to gain pleasure. But there’s also one very important thing to note about the pain versus pleasure paradigm: we will always do more to avoid pain in the short term and not in the long term.

1) Continue to send out a Soul Call and hold your intention to welcome your Soulmate into your heart.  Connect with your Soulmate at the inner level by visualizing and feeling him/her as if he or she is already in your life.  You can do this by buying them a card, or setting a place for them at your dinner table.  You can also buy a soulmate ring, as a symbol of you holding a special place in your heart for your One.  You may also want to listen to my ‘Soul Call’ guided meditation, especially when you’re feeling disconnected or negative about your love life.


Be like a kid who allows no impossibility to enter her manifesting realm. "Feeling" helps us release any doubt and negative energy. It generates excitement and positive feelings, which support us to take inspired action! So go test drive that car you want, or feel what it will be like to have the perfect partner in your life, because feeling is believing!

Realize you will likely have smaller manifestations first that show you are lining up more with what you want, like noticing more people you find attractive, when before, you saw no one, meeting people that have desirable qualities that you note as being important in a partner, or seeing more people "like you" in happy relationships, whether they are overweight, divorced or whatever personal characteristic that you think makes finding love harder.
If you are really struggling with relationships, there is something happening deep inside that is creating the outcomes you keep experiencing. You are getting something you want, you are protecting yourself from something you fear. You have some sort of image of yourself that deems you unworthy of love. Again, this may not vibe with your conscious mind, that is in a constant state of wanting happiness and good things. You are not cursed. You are not some horrible person that only deserves douches. You have the power to change this, if you are willing to do the inner work and take responsibility. And by responsibility, I don’t mean blame. Two very different energies there. One empowers us, and the other keeps us feeling terrible.
"[Manifesting destiny and the Law of Attraction are best explained by] the Law of Karma. It basically states that you will get negative if you think negative. For example, if you say, 'I never win anything' and you enter a raffle, you simply won’t win. You declared you won’t. If you focus on winning, and the person next to you puts out more positive energy than you do, you won’t win. The key is to give out the same energy you want back. If you want happiness, you look for the happiness and surround yourself with it and yours will grow," Estes explains.
Think about two droplets of water that are slowly moving towards each other. What happens as they get closer? They eventually get close enough that they attract each other and become one droplet of water instead of two separate ones. This occurs because they are of like vibration. Now, think about the same phenomena with a droplet of water and a droplet of oil. No matter how close you put them together they will not become one with each other. This is because their vibrations are too different from one another.
The law of attraction manifests through your thoughts, by drawing to you thoughts and ideas of a similar kind, people who think like you, and also corresponding situations and circumstances. It is the law and power that brings together people of similar interests, who unite into various groups, such as political groups, sports teams, sports fans, fraternities, etc.
It wasn’t until the morning after our little ‘party’ that I noticed something taped to the refrigerator – something that impacts me each time I read it. It was the IBD 10 Secrets to Success. Once my head cleared, I quickly copied them down and read them over and over again. After our vacation I made copies and posted them in my home office and inside a journal I decided to keep.
Shelly Bullard, MFT is a Marriage and Family Therapist, Love Coach and Spiritual Teacher. She's the author of the eBook: How to Become the Most Attractive Version of Yourself which she offers for FREE (click here to receive your free copy). She's also the instructor of the popular mbg courses: How To Become The Most Attractive Version of Yourself & How to Attract a Partner Who's Ready for Deep, Devoted Love. Shelly believes that when you access the experience of Love within yourself, your relationships become deeply fulfilling and you become the person you’re meant to be. She was named the “Love Guru” as one of the 100 Women to Watch in Wellness by mindbodygreen, and her deepest passion is living and practicing love and relationships as a spiritual path. To learn more about how she can help you create more love in your life, visit her at: shellybullard.com.

Hi Geoff! Thank you for your reply. I do understand the chapter is about getting an ex back. However, what I meant to ask is whether the same rule applies if the person you want to manifest a relationship with is someone you haven’t previously dated. You see I talk to him everyday and he often tends to talk about the girl he is with or unknowingly tells me how I mean a lot to him but only as a friend. And every time that happens I just can’t stop negative thoughts of fear and doubt cropping up in my mind, thus making it difficult for me to let go. So I want to know if I should maintain some distance, perhaps talk less often. The only issue here is that there isn’t really any problem between us. He knows I love him and we kind of sorted it out a couple of months back and have continued to be best friends. I don’t quite have a reason to suddenly cut down on talking to him and I am sure if I do that he would want to know why.


"Scientific experiments using a placebo effect for health reasons have shown that if you believe something will make you feel better. Rven if it is a sugar pill and not a true medication, it will cause you to think you feel better and then you do. ... Every time you think of a negative thought, you need three positives ones to negate it. If you focus all your positive energy on a positive outcome, it will happen. You can see this with prayer, as people focus on sending a positive message up in prayer for a positive outcome," Estes explains.


TF shows you real self and opens soul to feel unconditional Divine Love for it is divine power. On the soul level there are soul improvements to benefit you both as a mirror and you learn 2 are One in your energy feelings of soul connection. Over time you learn to work together as you live in true self and honor and listen to own soul as you walk the journey. Twin improves soul for soul journey and Divine marriage Union. There is magical connection and wont feel comfortable with anyone else if you choose not to commit. The soul is always looking for its counterpart to bring you close to divine powers that make you Divine beings and feel angelic power inside of you. This Divine Love vibration inside will change you and others around you and they will feel it.. The vibrations are not from the heart but from the soul.
Besides, getting your turn to succeed won’t work unless you can execute, and steer away from harmful behavior that destroys whatever progress you have made towards success. That’s where the fourth secret comes in: get your priorities right; use your resources wisely; stay focused; develop the right relations; don’t be greedy; and don’t be complacent—as we have discussed in a separate piece.
Me and my boyfriend are in love since 6 years. I went abroad to study. His parents marry him to a girl because of he difference in religion. After 2 months he married he contact me. I want to get him back again as we cannot live without each other. I am far and will be back in some months. I want to use the Law of Attraction to get him back. How to manifest to get him.

If there is a healthy balance between the two entities in our person, then love comes at just that moment. The universe has all the keys, we simply have to remain willing and open to how it will show up. Sometimes it’s not what we expect. More often than not, it can be a different personality, yet someone who is there to mirror and show us more of what we need or can handle.
Thanks for your comments. Since you obviously have advanced knowledge on how to use a law of attraction, I assume that you have achieved all of your goals and fulfilled all of your dreams. Now you are a very rich millionaire trying to help the rest of us. Actually, you wouldn't be doing that because as LOA founder Wallace Wattles said "do not talk about poverty...do not spend your time in charitable work,...all charity only tends to perpetuate the wretchedness it aims to eradicate."
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But, once you start seeing your external experience is a mirror of what you feel and believe, you will make the amazing realization that changing your internal world will change what you bring into your life. If you don’t believe you have to settle or compromise, you won’t. If you believe you will find the right person, you will. If you know you don’t have to end up alone, you won’t. Sound too simplistic? Is the skeptical part of you being activated and resisting this? Are you thinking of all your experiences that have ‘proved’ your current set of beliefs, beyond a shadow of a doubt, and saying to yourself that I don’t know what the hell I am talking about? But, this is really all there is to it.Life is so much easier than we make it out to be.

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 I remember a woman with a learning disability who kept talking her way into jobs that she then failed at until she finally rose to prominence in a cosmetics company. Every successful author has gone through a prolonged period of rejection after rejection. Many of the greatest Presidents have failed at previous endeavors or been defeated in previous campaigns. These include Grant, Lincoln and even Washington.
Show gratitude. Write down all the things the Universe has given you. Be thankful for what you already have and be thankful for all the things the Universe has given you. The Universe has done a lot of things for us. Paying the Universe back with some gratitude will motivate the Universe to do even more things and will draw more things into your life. If you were once bullied and that person stopped, that's one thing to be thankful for. If the person you're crushing on likes you back, or doesn't but they didn't send their lover out to hurt you, that's another thing to thank the Universe for. You should also thank the Universe for this process too. Showing gratitude will turbo boost the Universe to manifest your request faster.
And then, sometimes I think that the current relationship will eventually end in some way if the person working consciously with LOA makes such dramatic shifts that she and her current partner are just too far away from each other vibrationally. This could definitely happen without your ending it specifically–the other person could end it, it could be mutual and amicable, something could happen that creates a large rift and you both can’t see a way to move past it, or you may decide to end it and it won’t feel as scary as it may currently because you just know it is the right thing to do. I don’t think being unhappy with a relationship as it currently is now is an absolute sign that it is not right..ultimately, it depends on so many individual factors, and as the person doing the LOA work gets deeper and more in touch with what is happening, she will have a sense of what she really wants and how she thinks it will play out. It does take a degree of honesty that can feel a bit uncomfortable, but necessary.
5) Affirmations (pgs. 241-242) and Focused Intentions (pgs. 244-245): There are fifty powerful and healing affirmations to choose from for incorporating them into all types of lifestyles. My current favorite two affirmations are: 1) I value my life and myself more and more each day. My second favorite affirmation from the listing currently is: I always take responsibility for my own happiness. I find many wonderful things to be happy about each day. The focused intentions (fifteen great ones to choose from) also resonated with me because I agree with the viewpoint of the authors that they are helpful in increasing your personal power. My favorite intention is #1 (on page 244) which is: I am learning to walk the path of peaceful pursuit. I always take joyous action towards my goals, all the while releasing attachment to the outcome. I create a happy life now and draw more and more happiness to me.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and I am so glad you liked the post. I think a lot of people have that fear, so you are certainly not alone in that. One of the things that has helped me most with that is remembering how ‘challenging’ the human experience is, and knowing we all have our ‘stuff’ that we hold inside, bad things that have happened to us, etc.. For the most part, I think lots of people actually want to talk about these things and not feel like they are the only one struggling. Intellectually we know that isn’t true, but how we feel is often very different. When we think about it this way, sharing our own ‘stuff’ feels less scary. And, as you work on your attraction, you will naturally begin to meet up with people who you do feel comfortable with, and will not pull away when things get closer.

How is that one person is willing to do all that it takes to reach their goals, while another person gives in to silent resignation at the first sign of resistance? Why is one person willing to sacrifice nearly everything in order to live the life of their dreams, while others are too afraid to take the next step in fear of suffering through a catastrophic failure or embarrassment?
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